For how many long I cant remember

HYE :) WOW It's been so long that I had ignored my blog. (Pfft It's not like anyone would want to read my blog kan) Btw, sepatutnya my opening would be Salam. Sheesh Juji no manners :l 

Assalamualaikum :) 

Tak jawab dosa, kalau jawab sayang :) Anyway, It's October now. And I'm so close to my final exams. For now, I've gone through Biology 2 and Algebra. 6 more subjects to go. This Tuesday I have a MUET speaking test, I wish everything would go well. Insya Allah. 

I couldn't say that I would let out everything by tonight. But I hope I could. Because now, everything is so jumble up that I feel that the only way is to let it out through writing in the blog. Pathethic, I know. However, I fear I might not get the chance to even finish what I intend to write. As I mention before, I have 6 more subjects to go through and the only reason that I'm in front of the screen now is because I HAVE TO LET OUT EVERYTHING. Should I not finish what I started tonight, my apologies then.

BEWARE! This might be long and boring!

 So,to begin, I might say that I'm not a very perfect person. Heck, I'm so not close to perfect. I make mistakes. Everyone does it, right? But somehow, I'd say that I made a very foolish big mistake ever whenever I thought about my past. It's so stupid. I'm so stupid. *Face-palm  

Would I say it's a regret? Maybe. No matter what, the past is the past and I can never turn back time nor could I undo what I did. I have to accept that fact somehow. I have to learn to let go. True. I broke something and now I have to accept the consequences and bear with it. Pandai buat pandai tanggung la kan. 

*I would just like to take a second of your time to say "Yeayy yeayy padan muka ju padan muka ju"

Well tonight, those memories came without me asking for it. I don't freaking know why. It just came. All the sweet memories, the laughs - they just came flashing before me. Man, I so hate it when it happened. *cursing myself.

I opened up to Sabrini later tonight, had a Dr.Phil session with her, but still somehow I feel I needed more. Some of what she said was true though. I have to, by hook or by crook, let go. Like, HAVE TO. It would be a bulls**t if to say I never took the time to encounter with everything I had. Bengong kan, aku rasa dari dulu lagi aku nak let go let go tapi, asal cani lak do? This is all just too confusing. My mind is so messed up. Sabrini said I have to set things straight. But how??? I can't talk to him like everything is okay. Like "Hey, whatsupppppp?" After everything, I just couldn't. Ego tinggi pun satu. Haih, Ju, turunkan laa ego kau tuu. TANAK! *ok ini degil.

So,now, I would have to say that, I'm confused and I really don't know what to do. Somehow I have to focus on my exams first. I hope Allah has a better plan for me. I know that He knows better. Have faith. Yes, that's just what I'll do. Keep on holding to my faith. Whatever will happen or happened have its reason. Insya Allah everything wiil turn out to be okay. And as for you, I pray for your happiness :) May you achieve what you wanted in life and may your life be full with barakah :) Good night. Till later. Assalamualaikum w.b.t :)